Dream Dead

It may be late to say anything, but I was once told by my gym coach's brother that you don't give up on anything you want to do. He told me to put my faith in God and keep going to ensure your dreams come true and what you want to do are accomplished. My art instructor, Charles Zembillas, told me that you must always be optimistic and determined to keep following your dreams in animation. I've never ignored their words, and I'll never ever let that day come. Hope lives through all situations. Through all disasters. And no matter what the odds are or what sacrifices need to be made, your hope survives to see you win. 


See, this is MY situation now. I'm dreaming to become the next big creator in comics/animation/TV/video games/movies making my own media conglomerate and my own popular franchises and working on MANY dream versions of popular franchises in these mediums, but where am I now? And what are the facts? What are the odds?

I am a college kid who's had a history of obsessive-compulsive disorder that took over my life and ravaged the people around me. I'm also a late underachiever who never took the time to grow up and actually didn't want to improve himself at all. I kept getting worse for the sake of my obsessions. When I was enrolled in the Advanced Media Vocational Academy, I was kicked out because I was doing disruptive compulsions like standing on the water fountain and the chair and involving my classmates in my compulsions. I also got out of the Animation Academy because of my OCD. It was...devastating.

And then this year, everything changed. I thought that I wanted to stop a chain of compulsions and thought if I had my last chance for my dream career, I HAD to make this count. And that was it. That was the beginning of my effort. This was when I started embracing the anxiety of obsessive thoughts and improving myself. It was going well from the start, getting better as time progressed. Now I'm working to get myself back to the AMVA and the Animation Academy to show that I've come this long way and am now ready to start the trail to victory.

Other problems I'm facing now for my career are how most days I haven't spent drawing and writing as much as I should be. The reasoning is complicated; I forget to draw and/or write after I told myself to do it and I mostly spend time playing on the computer rather than using it creatively. No one on deviantART is commenting on my work, and for that matter no one is commenting on my creativity at all. Writing or art, it just hasn't got a single word. And Alisa Wolf, the person my mother should contact so the appointment to get back into the AMVA didn't answer me for a long time. But is that it? Is that the end of my path?

Absolutely not.

First, Alisa actually DID answer me last night and my mother has sent an email to her and I await Alisa's answer. If it doesn't come tonight, it will come tomorrow. If it doesn't come tomorrow, it will come the day after. If it doesn't come for so long that I lose my mind about it, it will come just in time. Second, as for all other problems I have, I WILL get them all corrected. It will take time. It will take effort. It will take passion, pain, and power and I will keep going.

My point is that for your dreams and your goals to come true...you keep going. You keep going no matter what people say, no matter what gets in your way, no matter what happens, how things turn out for the worse, or how many doors to your victory close. T.O.M. from Toonami put it like this: "Get back up on your feet, because it's the getting back up that counts. And that shows you've got heart. That's what keeps you going. Fall down seven times...get up eight." Hercules from Disney's Hercules sang it out when he sang "Go the Distance". I believe YOU can sing it out. And if I believe you can sing it out, then truly YOU can sing it out. And if you can sing it out to the end and finally start drawing your favorite childhood characters professionally, you WILL start drawing these characters professionally.